of dogs and dawgs


‘Tis the season when many an aspiring actor auditions for television pilots. (Los Angeles has five seasons: fall, winter, spring, summer, pilot). My actress friend A. hit it out of the park quickly, landing a role in a show called ‘Law Dogs’ about “a group of dueling lawyers.” The show is backed with solid credentials and on, as she put it, “a real network”*, so she’s psyched. She has also drawn vacation time — she no longer has to run around for meetings/auditions and won’t start shooting until April.

“My character is really smart,” she told me.

“Which explains why they cast you.” Not because she herself is smart and educated — of course not — but because she’s brunette.

“And she’s kind of dorky and hopeless with men.”

A. can relate. Her recent romantic interest is in rehab. This is a fairy tale as it unfolds in 2007 Los Angeles: pop star/prince meets beautiful actress/princess and they live happily ever after in his castle in a wealthy gated community on Mulholland. For two weeks. Before the prince checks into rehab in an undisclosed location in another state and the princess finds herself saying things like, “I was Googling him and recent media reports put him in [names one of two prominent rehab centers in area].”


Last night I went with A. and others to a Global Green event, some kind of pre-Oscar thing, which basically amounted to lounging around a very crowded club before Maroon 5 took the stage at shortly after ten. While coming back from the bar I got bodychecked by a photographer who wasn’t paying attention to anyone other than the representative of the celebrity species who had strayed into his midst: I saw a delicate, dark-eyed woman with her hair up. I didn’t recognize her. “That’s Penelope Cruz,” A. said in my ear. I could barely recognize her.** Sometimes they look like they just stepped offscreen, and sometimes they don’t.***

Maroon 5 was pretty good. Adam Levine (the lead singer) had a suit thing going on. This seemed to meet with widespread female approval. The boy knew how to cock his hips and wield his guitar. On my right, someone was saying, “He reminds me of Justin Timberlake, only better and cooler.” On my left, A. was saying, “I knew him in high school and he slept with all the girls. Except me. He was too busy sleeping with my friends.”

They debuted a new song. Can’t remember what it was called, but I loved it as soon as the bassline kicked in and want to download it as soon as possible.

*A’s ‘real network’ comment reminded me of a quote from Sarah Michelle Gellar when the interviewer asked if her friends and family were thrilled/proud when she landed the career-making role. She said something like, “Try explaining to people how you’re a character named Buffy in something called Buffy the Vampire Slayer which is a midseason replacement show on a network they’ve never heard of, and see how much respect you get.”

** A. does a very amusing Penelope Cruz impression.

***I once walked past Bruce Willis — literally brushing shoulders with the man — in a near-empty parking lot and the only thing to clue me in was the sudden surprised silence of my female companions (they mentioned his name once he was out of earshot). All I’d noticed was a short muscled dude in a baseball cap talking on his cell phone.


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